What Your Drink Order Says About You?

By Mohan V April 16, 2018
Drinks we can't get enough of. Image source-iStock/ilyabolotov

It might not look like it from the outside, but every bartender is a therapist, in a way. They get their fair share of patients   patrons, and it’s their job to know what their customers want – and how best to provide it.

The only difference is, in this case, the customer prepares the prescription.

The job doesn’t end there, though. Part of being in the service industry is knowing your guest in and out before you’ve even met them.

What, then, can your server or bartender glean about you from your prescription?

Read on to find out.

Wine

Pop that champagne

Pop that champagne. Image source 

You’re a light drinker, and odds are you dislike, or aren’t in the mood for a beer right now. Maybe you still want to get zonked, but you’re in no hurry.

Perhaps, like me, you’re the kind that likes to take their time with their drink, enjoying each sip as if it were your first. Red, white, rosé – there’s one for everyone. There’s even a blue wine on the market now that’s guaranteed to raise some eyebrows.

And of course, nothing screams “party” like popping the cork off that champagne, having it fly into someone else’s soup, and spilling those bubbles all over your favourite tux.

Old Fashioned

Old Fashioned Cocktail

Old Fashioned Cocktail. Image source

You’re a stickler for the classics – and not just any old classic. You’re very particular about how you like your drinks made.

It’s likely the only Old Fashioned you’ll ever truly love is your own, because only you know how you like it best. Down to the last dissolved crystal of brown sugar, to the number of anti-clockwise stirs, to the locally-sourced orange peel for the garnish.

You either really know your stuff, or you want to be one of those people that does.

Perhaps you’re looking for a glimpse into the past. Maybe the answers to your questions are at the bottom of that glass?

I’ll admit it freely, I didn’t know a thing about cocktails when I had my first Old Fashioned, and it was a revelatory experience.

I wish I could say more, but it was so delicious that I ended up having one too many, and any memory of that night has since been long lost.

Rum & Coke

Rum and Coke

Rum and Coke. Image source

Since you’re just one squeeze of lime away from recreating the iconic Cuba Libre, it’s safe to assume that you were once a resistance fighter from the Spanish-American war in Cuba who was forced to flee the country. You got caught in the midst of a sudden cultural shift, and are now stuck in a foreign land with no place to call home.

Life is hard. You miss Cuba. You miss the…

Rum and Coke

Rum and Coke. Image source

Oh. Just to get wasted?

Yeah. Probably just to get wasted.

Whisky

Whisky

Whisky. Image source

If you’re drinking neat whisky, only two things are going through my head. It’s either “heartbreak”, or “purist”.

But whisky is just the kind of drink that could imply anything, really. It’s just as much about getting drunk as it is about enjoying a quiet, peaceful sip in the corner. It’s both for taste, and for medicine. Both to remember, and to forget.

Good times, and bad times.

But mostly good times.

Hot Toddy

Mulled Wine With Orange And Spices. Image source

Mulled Wine With Orange And Spices. Image source

You have the worst cold in the history of the world. Your throat is so dry, it would make sandpaper feel like silk. Your head is pounding so hard, your DJ friend could use it as a bass track in his new set.

You probably didn’t even order this, the bartender just took one look at you and said, “Don’t worry, this one’s on me.”

And one sip later, you realized what it meant to be alive.

Gin and Tonic

Gin And Tonic

Gin And Tonic. Image source

You’re probably the parent of the group. You’re still drinking hard liquor so your friends don’t judge you, but you also want everyone else to think you’re drinking water.

You also know that if you lose control of the group, you’ll have to organize a search party from here to Dombivili because Rohit has wandered off, and Saakshi has passed out on the pavement.

Or, like me, you just like gin. I don’t know your life.

LIIT

Long Island Ice Tea

Long Island Ice Tea. Image source

You’re honestly going to have a really incredible night. Maybe the best night of your life. Live every moment of it to the fullest. Dance your heart out, ignore everyone else, and sing every song at the top of your voice, even if you don’t know the words.

Just don’t puke on the couch, please. It’s new.

Tequila

There are two kinds of people : the ones who call for shots, and the ones who never say no to them.

There are also two voices in your head right now. The angel on your shoulder is pointing towards your unfinished LIIT, politely reminding you to stay in your aukaat.

The devil on the other shoulder is telling you that it’s just one shot, but you both know that it’s never just one shot.

So what’s it going to be?

In other news: The guy who directed The Hangover wants your number.

Beer 

It’s very likely that you’ve been all of the above people at one time in your life. If you haven’t yet, you will. Beer, after all, is the fuel that powers the social machine.

It’s not usually the protagonist of the night, but it’s the sidekick without which your night probably wouldn’t even exist.

You are:

  • A light drinker (just beer, thank you)
  • A heavy drinker (twelve large, please)
  • An introvert (wow, I need a beer.)
  • An extrovert (wow, I need a beer!)
  • Both early and late to the party.

You are everyone, and they are you.

In fact, I think I’m going to get one right now.

—-x——

Ultimately, the idea behind every drink is to just have fun in your own way.  No matter what your choice of drink, we’re all the same when it comes to having a good time. And don’t let anyone tell you any different.